May 17

7 Happy Father’s Day Tips

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It’s almost MY TURN!  Woo-hoo!  The time is approaching to celebrate the father! And because I know my wife reads my blog, I am going to use this as an opportunity to secretly suggest what I want…and I’ll cover it in the blanket of “What ALL dads want for Father’s Day.” Hopefully she’ll gloss over the first paragraph, though, cuz I might have said too much there.

So what do all dads want for Father’s Day?  Here are some suggestions:

  1. Useless Pieces Of Junk – We will not be thinking of it this way.  I am just trying to get into your head on how you should feel when you pick something out.  It should stink of money wasting.  And the more AA batteries it takes, the better.  The key thing to think about, as you are out shopping for something useless, is that ALL fathers don’t relate to stuff on an emotional level.  Don’t try and get all sentimental on him.  Trust me, he will feel all kinds of warm fuzzies that you cared enough to buy something stupid for him.  NOT an ugly joke tie, or ANY kind of clothing.  ALL fathers HATE getting clothes as presents.  It must be useless.  Maybe get him that tiny helicopter thing that you see at the mall all the time.  He would love to watch his children be amazed at how cool he is flying that thing.  Just remember, if dad would NEVER be able to justify buying it, then it’s a sure bet.   The less practical, the better.
  2. Golfing makes daddy happy.

    GOLF – All dads want to do on Father’s Day is go play a round of golf in the morning.  Every single dad stays home with their kids during the week as the stay at home parent and as much as they love their children, they just want to get the hell out of that house and play some golf with their brother.  Every dad will want to play that course they played out there in Moorpark that one time.  I think it’s Cheseboro Canyon.  Don’t worry, just let the father know he will be heading out for golf, and he’ll contact his brother and make arrangements.

  3. Quality Kid Time – For Father’s Day, getting some quality time with the family is crucial.  Probably after the round of golf and a nice relaxing lunch and some couch time, there can be a fun family outing planned.  Hikes are great.  Beaches are also great.  Places where the two year old can scream and be crazy without any parent feeling they need to intervene are ideal. If you’re going to take your Father out for dinner, make SURE there is booth seating.
  4. The Avengers 3D - If Father hasn’t gotten the chance to get out and see The Avengers 3D by Father’s Day, then suck it up, get a babysitter, and endure the 2.5 hours of awesomeness.  He deserves it.
  5. Sex – Why not celebrate Fatherhood by enjoying the very thing that began the process in the first place! …Please?
  6. A Card From The Kids – Father’s don’t need the kids to make them anything, but having the kids write something about their father is perfect.  We did one of these for Mother’s Day that I got from the kick ass site “All For The Boys.”  It would work equally well for Fathers.
  7. Useless Junk - This is just a reminder.  Don’t forget this one!  Dads want something useless they can make and/or play WITH the kids.  It is in the bonding experience that the dad gets his emotionalizations.  Just get him something ridiculously stupid that takes batteries.  Quit trying to talk yourself out of it.

    Boys want useless junk! GIMME SOME JUNK!!

These are just some things that I know that ALL dads want for Father’s Day.  You cannot go wrong with these suggestions.  Trust me!

Do you have other suggestions?

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