Nov 30

More Honesty from Sir Noble Talksalot


He seems so innocent and kind...

For those of you that do not already know, I’m an actor.  I mainly have been successful with commercials.  A couple of spots I’ve done can be seen here, and here.

Normally, I have to bring Alistair in to the auditions.  And every so often, because of the audition time, I need to bring them both.  Such was the case on Friday.

The audition was for an HBO commercial.  The role was “obnoxious guy on cell phone on the bus”.  This was perfect!  This is my “type”! I’m usually called in for the office idiot, the young dad, or the obnoxious guy on cell phone on the bus roles. And I’ve been to this casting office a number of times, and know them to be kid friendly, so I wasn’t concerned about it.

The only downside to the audition happened when we first got there.  Unfortunately, the obnoxious guy on the cell phone on the bus was sitting next to the “wierd guy trapped in bus seat by the obnoxious guy” in the scene.  So the room was filled with people who looked like me and also many “charactery characters”: guy with odd face, guy with no neck, etc.

I just got done posting about Noble and his honesty.  And now I have more to add to the list. As we sat down in the room filled with struggling actors, Noble singles out one particular man and says to me, in a non whisper, “Dad!  Look at how tiny that man is!” Puzzled, I look over and then HAY-O! There’s a really tiny man sitting on the bench waiting for his turn to read.  So I try to convey to Noble that it’s not polite to talk about people while they are in the room.

And then, much to my horror, I realized that in order to sign in for the audition, I had to walk past the tiny man.  Noble wouldn’t stay seated on a bench while I went up to sign in, so I had to allow him to come with me.  Hoping that my wonderful dad speech about politeness was still fresh in his head, we went over to sign in.  But just as things seemed to go perfectly, as we walked past the poor man on our way back to the seat, Noble says, “Dad, hey dad?  That tiny man has horrible breath! I smelt it when we walked by!”

What the hell!!!!! COME ON!

And so we had the talk. Again.  I’m thankful that when it was my turn to read for the part, the guy I read with was only mildly “charactery”.  There wasn’t anything too profound for Noble to draw uncomfortable attention to.  Thankfully!

And that is why I don’t take Noble to auditions anymore, if I can help it.

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