May 24

My Love For My Children: A Bruno Mars Comparison


Have you heard that Grenade song by Bruno Mars? (If not, I embedded it below.) Personally, I don’t think he’d catch a grenade for anybody.  I also have a hard time believing that he can’t afford a moving company to haul that piano.  This video/song just isn’t right.  Now if you were talking about how I feel about my kids, then I would say this video is a little more accurate.  Let’s go down the list.  Would I catch a grenade for Noble?  Yes. Yes, I would.  I would also be very angry afterward.

Would I throw my hand on a blade for Alistair?  I’m not quite sure how that scenario would ever come to fruition.  FOR him?  Would this mean that he somehow got into a knife fight with another 20 month old?  I usually let knife fights play themselves out before I intervene.  And even then, I don’t throw my hand on the blade; I go for a safer wrist grab. So I’ll say no.  No to that.

Would I jump in front of a train for Noble or Alistair?  Why?  Would that stop a train from hitting them? I’m pretty sure we’re all goners in that scenario.  But sure, I guess.  If I needed to somehow jump in front of a train to buy a couple miliseconds of time so that they could jump off the track, then yeah, ok, I’ll do that.  Kind of like the grenade scenario, I would be pretty ticked off afterward though.

Every so often, I feel compelled to validate the love for my children by invalidating somebody else’s love.  In Bruno Mars’s case, I would replace the word “love” with “stalker’s psychotic obsession”

This post has been brought to you by the “I love my children more than Bruno Mars loved his ex-girlfriend” foundation. Currently we are accepting cookies, electronics, and Facebook “likes” here: The Stay At Homer on Facebook.

Side note: Watching the video, would I haul a piano tied to a rope, through traffic? No, I would not. ESPECIALLY if it was through gang territory. And even more especially if I was just gonna leave it in front of a train. That’s asinine. Give it Goodwill or something! Some of those places will even do pick up. Seriously.


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