May 18

So You Want Kids?

If there’s one question I get asked all the time, it’s, “Hey Russ, first of all, you look amazing in that gray sweatshirt!  I’m so glad you wear it every day!  But more importantly, I’m thinking about having a kid!  My only issue is that all the information I’m finding on the subject is very specific.  I was wondering if you could give me a vague explanation on what parenting is all about.

Sure I can!

Parenting is taking 2 steps forward, then five THOUSAND steps back. Then 5 more steps back.  Then it’s 3 amazing steps forward, with a freaky side step, and then a step back that’s surprisingly a relief.   Then you cross a bridge when you get to it, and there is a crossroad waiting for you on the other side. Doesn’t matter which way you travel, it will be wrong.  You accept that and make your choice.  Then you come to a fork in the road and realize it’s just a big crapshoot, life’s too short, so you should just enjoy these forks when they present themselves. Every once in awhile you pick the right fork, and that will make up for the 10 you got wrong. Your body will age exponentially;  you will want to murder anybody who claims to be tired, because they have no idea; and the best way to tell if you are doing it right is if you feel like you are doing it wrong.

Patience is key.  Alcohol helps.  Remove your sense of smell and all will be well.

Hope that helps.

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