Mar 21

Talk Exhaustion

It has recently been brought to my attention that it is quite possible to become completely exhausted simply by being talked to, all day, by my 4 year old son. I can’t recall the last time I felt so utterly drained.  The closest relative to this kind of “wiped out” feeling would be that exhaustion you have the day after you’ve had some nasty food poisoning.  The body just wants to shut down and recoup.

It begins in the morning with , “Can I have Trix, can I pick out the Trix, get me a spoon, I want to eat over here, can I have a tv show, one that I haven’t seen, daddy, daddy, will you play in my room with me, I don’t want to brush my teeth, my belly is telling me that I don’t need to brush my teeth.”

It continues into lunchtime, “Dad swing me around, daddy, look, look, look, daddy look what I’m doing, daddy look look”

Then comes the afternoon with more, “Daddy look, look what I can do, let’s make soup, let’s play golf, i have to make a poopy, come with me so we can talk…..”

And more in the evening, and more during bath, and even more during story time, when I’m supposed to be the one reading the sotry!  Talking, talking, talking.  There is this direct link between his brain and his mouth, and the filter part hasn’t grown in or something! It’s nonstop!  My brain is fried from input!

Oh, how many times I fantasized about saying, “Hey Noble, I’ve got an idea!  Why don’t you shut the hell up for 2 minutes!!” But then I’d be tired AND feel like the world’s worst parent.  It’s still just a fantasy, though.  But in my fantasy, Noble says back, “Oh, sure.  Sorry dad, here I am rambling, and you must be just…” and then I interrupt with ,”I thought I just told you to shut the hell up!” and he winks at me and makes that gun clicky gesture with his fingers – the one that means, “I gotcha buddy!  Say no more!” A guy can dream.

And now, like offsetting my carbon footprint, I have some offsetting of my own to do.  I can’t be going off about wanting my son to shut the F up without offsetting it with a little Pro-Noble.  So, with that:  Noble  is REALLY cute when he’s sleeping.  He also says some of the cutest, funniest things in the world.  I especially like the way he says, “all of a sudden”.  He says, “all a suns”.

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